The Power of Self-Love: Embracing Your Wholeness with Lauren Leduc

So welcome back to the Real Life Momz podcast, where moms come to you for inspiration and tools to create the life that they desire. I am Lisa Foster. I'm your host. And today I am joined by Lauren Leduc. She is a yoga teacher, intuitive mentor, author and fellow podcast host of your Spiritual Besties podcast.

It sounds amazing. And Lauren, I'm really excited to have you here today. Thank you so much for having me, Lisa. I'm excited for our conversation. Me too. You're a mom, but you do like a hundred other things. You have so many tools in your tool bucket there that I'm just excited to kind of tap into. I've explored your website.

You have courses, you have retreat, you have so many things. So this is really going to be fun. So maybe we could just start by telling us a little bit actually about your passion. Cause you really like to help women to love [00:01:00] themselves and embrace their wholeness. So would you mind just telling us a little bit more about what that actually means to you?

And why do you think that's so important for us? Yeah, I know for me, it just stems from what I've needed in my life. So I don't want to, I don't know if I'll go through my whole story, but I was diagnosed with an eating disorder at age 17 and The time leading up to that, I was like really trying to fit into this good girl box, and I live in the Midwest, it's the Bible Belt, there are very, uh, I'd say like, kind of constricting or confined ways that women are supposed to act, and there's this very specific trajectory for life, and I just realized I wasn't fitting into it and kind of crashed and burned, which set me off on about a decade of healing and self discovery and failure and fun and experimenting and all kinds of stuff [00:02:00] to really figure out like who I am, what my strengths are, And it led me to teaching yoga, which I started at age 29.

So 10 years ago, and in yoga, everything just kind of clicked into place. It was like everything I had quote unquote failed at suddenly made sense because I was using all these skills and my career. And my path to spirituality was so individual, and yoga provides the path, in a really, like, open way that allows for, like, individual experience, and that also opened me up to this concept of, like, sacred feminine.

Which I hadn't heard of before growing up, but I grew up with this very specific idea of who God is and what he does and what to do, how to believe, how to get to heaven, for instance, and I'm not here to bash any of that, but just to say that by opening up my [00:03:00] mind and connecting with my own spirituality, I was able to really, like, see how much of the world worships, what they believe and not necessarily take that on, but just have my mind open to what's possible, if that makes sense. 

And I started seeing goddesses and it was the first time I really like saw myself in the divine and the divine in me. And I started learning about all of these different aspects of. Goddesses, they're not just these beautiful ethereal things like there are ones who are destroyers, there are ones who are warriors, there are ones who are mothers, they really run the gamut.

So in this like healing journey and then, then teaching and building my business and all of that in the last decade, I really embraced Um, I think the things about myself that I used to think were weaknesses and made them into my strengths. And to really embrace, like, the sacred [00:04:00] femininity within me and the inner divinity.

And that's really come with a lot more self love and self acceptance than, like, self improvement. While, like, yes, there are things I can do to improve my life, of course. Like, Sleeping in every day and, like, eating junk or whatever isn't going to necessarily, like, help, uh, connect me with my highest self, although no judgment if that's what you do.

Um, it's more about, like, how do I look at all of these different aspects of myself, untether them from societal, cultural, religious programming, and then, like, really love on all of these different things. So that's what I love. Doing, you know, through yoga and intuitive readings and coaching and through this book I've written is helping connect women and fems to this sense of wholeness and, loving, you know, all the different parts of themselves [00:05:00] and seeing things that probably society thinks of as weaknesses as superpowers.

Oh, I love that. And I haven't really heard that concept before. This is new to me. So. I'm interested to know how do you accept those things that you kind of feel are weaker, like this is my weakness. How do you even turn that into a strength, especially when society is also looking at it the same way as you are?

Yeah, I guess I'll answer by sharing a personal story of one, one that I found was I was having such a hard time, you know, over a decade ago, and I literally googled, why do I hate myself? Because I just couldn't figure it out. I'm like, what, like, what is wrong? Why can't I just like love and accept myself?

Somehow in that Google search, I found this book called The Highly Sensitive Person. And I found that really intriguing, I'm like, huh, like that kind of sounds like me when I clicked on it and started [00:06:00] reading more. And it was about people who feel very intensely and who feel like really sensitive to the stimulus in our world as well.

And I started learning more about myself and I'm like, huh, like just because our culture doesn't celebrate more sensitive souls doesn't mean there is. Anything wrong with them whatsoever, we just don't really have the structure and system set up to support that. But people who are more sensitive tend to be more intuitive.

They tend to have a lot of compassion. They tend to have the capacity to be of great service to the world. It just requires a certain level of self care. I think a certain level of community care as well. So for me, that's one example of 

taking something that seemed like a liability. and turning it into an asset because it's something I value and certainly use a lot in my, in my [00:07:00] work life and in my mothering life as well.

I've just had to create, I think, the correct boundaries around it and the correct amount of self care to like really stay in my own energy. And I've had to care less, honestly, about what other people think or what they expect of me. Because, like, a parent might think that Because I'm smart that I should have chosen a career that is in the medical field or pharmaceuticals or something like that, when I know, like, in my soul that that just is not a fit for me because of The level of sensitivity that I hold, if that makes sense.

And the capacity to feel like deep emotions is part of the feminine. And when I'm talking about the feminine, I'm not talking about women, I'm talking about these like different energies that reside within us. And because we live in like a capitalistic, patriarchal, colonialist culture, it tends to squash some of those more subtle feminine qualities.

Um, so that's one example. [00:08:00] Um, another one might be like. Maybe there's a woman who constantly feels jealous or triggered by other women and that really does feel like this weakness, but the triggers could be pointing to like where they need to expand out to or where they need to grow. So say you're triggered by someone being happy on social media or even like being kind of sexy, right?

That might be pointing to like a part of yourself that you're neglecting, you know? So I think there are all these seeming shadows that are actually just. Uh, there to be illuminated and nurtured. My question to you, though, will be, so someone listening today, and they're feeling maybe where you are, they're Googling, like, why do I hate myself?

It's just awful, really. But you're not alone, right? I mean, people feel that way. And at least you're talking about it to others and helping now other people, but Where do you start? I mean, I'm [00:09:00] assuming that place, it's nice that you came around and found this path, but where does someone even start to, you know, do something different and recognize that weakness being a strength?

Well, one, I think is to know that you're not alone. Like for me, learning about. Many, many other people who have those similarities to me was very important. So that might mean getting a therapist, that might mean having a coach, or getting some great, like, craniosacral, like you, like you offer, or seeing an intuitive, like it's, or reaching out to friends, like, it's first about, like, not isolating yourself, in my opinion.

I know for, for me, There were certain things I did need to do on my own, but I feel like my healing accelerated when I had The support around me that I needed, and I had to ask for help to get that. Um, so that's number one. Number two is, like, once you are receiving help, having some sort of, [00:10:00] like, structure and assistance around it.

So, I'll share a little bit about my book. Not that I think it's going to, like, take someone from hating themselves to loving themselves. I think that's pretty extreme, and it's a lot to ask in, you know, the seven weeks that, that the book is meant to take. Um, but the process for me... It does not include any kind of bypassing, meaning we start with kind of the hardest stuff and then work our way up.

So this might be a good segue to talk about the chakra system because this is how my book is structured. So I'll, I'll start by saying, because I know probably not everyone listening is like super spiritual, the first thing I'll say is you do not have to believe in the existence of this to benefit from it.

It's hard to like. believe in things that we can't touch and see and all that. But this is like ancient esoteric knowledge that Yogi's downloaded a long time ago, and it's been finessed and kind of evolved throughout the [00:11:00] years. But this is how we see them and work with them in modern day. So in the yogic body, it encompasses a lot more than the physical.

It's your physicality, but it's also your thoughts and your emotions and your breath and your energy. and your soul. So all of these things make up like the quote unquote body. And through this body, or you might think of as like an aura, runs all of these channels of life force energy, they call it, or prana.

There are three main ones that run along the spine. , there's the main one called shishumna, so it runs from like the tailbone to crown of head. There is one on the right called pingala, which is the quote unquote masculine. And this is like, Not, I don't want to say it's, it's male. It's masculine in that it's, uh, more solar.

It's penetrating. It's straightforward. It's structured. Uh, and then on the left is Ida, which is the feminine [00:12:00] channel. And again, can it correlate with women? Yes, but also it's just a little bit different. You can think of them kind of like Yin and Yang. Very, very similar to that concept, where it's more receptive, more wild, more cyclical, more lunar, So these qualities or these channels kind of intersect around the main channel and everywhere they cross becomes a major chakra.

So it's like these two energy points hit each other and create this whirling vortex of energy. So a chakra is a whirling vortex of energy. So I'm a yoga educator, so I can really know. Oh my God, I'm eating it up so much. I'm like, I didn't know they cross like I've heard that's what it is. That makes so much sense. 

I love it. In some models, they kind of like cross and intersect more like DNA. So it's a very like cool concept. So each of these, there are seven major ones along the spine, and each of them holds like different information about your humanity. [00:13:00] So It works a lot, like, um, what is it? Maslov's Hierarchy of Needs, I think it's called, where, like, the most basic needs are on the bottom, and, uh, then you work your way up from there.

Very similar. So you start at, like, the root, which is at the tailbone, and that holds, like, Your finances, your home, your body, your health, even your inner child and ancestry, it's what roots you to this earth and it's like your connection to the earth too. You go up and at the very top is the crown chakra and that is what holds like your connection to source or spirit or god or the universe or however.

One wants to define it, even just connectivity, maybe. So each of these different zones in the body becomes more and more like subtle as we go up. And that being said, for someone going on this journey, it's really important to tackle. Some of the like denser heavier human stuff before just going right to [00:14:00] like spiritual connection That's what spiritual bypassing is in my opinion So in my book we spend a week in each of these zones and really go through the different aspects of them I share a reading which will include some of my story, but also some yogic knowledge, some just kind of channeled or downloaded knowledge, along with reflection questions to consider your own relationship with these things, and then some sort of practice to drive at home.

I call it them embodiment practices to, like, take them out of the theoretical and bring them into your being. So, for instance, day one, we start with the body, and I know for, for women, for moms, like, this is a heavy, heavy concept, like, we are not taught to love our bodies. Is it getting a little better these days?

I think so, in a lot of ways, but I know I grew up with so much negative messaging around women's bodies in particular, so [00:15:00] healing that has taken many, many years. But. That's where we start. Um, and then end with like this divine connection, right? But there's a whole lot in between. There's a lot to unearth, and it's not about judging yourself.

It's more just about, I think, connecting with these multifacets that, that make us who we are. Yeah, that is amazing. And I love how you explained the chakra system itself. It's funny. You have an online, like, I think it's a quiz that you, is it you check your super power chakra, something like that. I did that.

And I ended up a mystical mama with, I guess, the third eye. Yeah.

Yeah, it's kind of your strengths lie. Um, and you know, theoretically we'd like them all working together in a balanced way, but I do think some people do show strengths in one area or another, [00:16:00] so it's kind of fun to see. That was fun, and I felt like that one I'm typically drawn to, so I feel like, oh that makes sense.

But, so here's a question for you Balancing, I'm assuming, these chakras, and I could be wrong with this because you're the expert here, but balancing these chakras seem like that's where kind of like optimal wholeness, optimal health would be. Is that correct? Yes. So how does one do that?

So it's a process you can, You know, work through my book. That's one way to do it. Number one. And we have to say your book's name because we haven't mentioned it. It's right. Embody your inner goddess, a guided journey to radical wholeness. So yes, that is your book. 

Thank you. There are many different ways. I would say just learning about them is a really great way to start. Because it's hard to, like, wrap your head around how to heal and balance them if you aren't pretty familiar with what they are. And [00:17:00] then there are different tools. Like, there's different body work, but, like, Reiki is a really great tool to, like, receive hands on healing for the chakras.

Um, some sort of, like, intuitive reading can be great. I do chakra readings for people, so I actually, like, Look at them also working with, like, a somatic coach could be great because you actually are, like, feeling into the bodily sensations of these areas. Yoga is also an awesome way to connect, but I'd also say, like.

Having enough space and stillness, which is not always an easy thing for moms, to really be able to listen inwardly is a great place to be as well, because your body holds so much information, it has so much to tell us, and even just by tuning in to its physical sensations, we can start to feel where we might be blocked.

For instance, there might be a subject that when you think about it, your throat just all the, all of a sudden starts closing up, right? And that [00:18:00] might show an imbalance in the throat chakra, especially when it comes to whatever subject that is. It might be like money. It might be relationships.

It might be like something you need to tell somebody and haven't told them yet. So that's one example of the body, just, just knowing what's up a lot of times if we're able to tune into it. I also have an introductory course called the 7 Day Chakra Makeover that's on my website, and it's a really great way to familiarize yourself with each one.

To feel into it to answer some reflections and then to do like a 10 minute, um, practice for the set each day for the 7 days. So it's a really great way to feel where you might be blocked and then practices to help start moving the energy. 

Yeah, those are great. Now, is there something that you tend to recommend to maybe the clients that you see, um, that they do kind of on their own at home that helps also [00:19:00] balance themselves?

Is there like a, a go to thing that you'd like to recommend? It's hard to say for go to. So when I'm working with a client, I'm looking at them individually. So everybody's chakras hold different balances and imbalances. Also know this isn't a fixed state. They're going to kind of like how your mood changes.

They'll change a bit. So, um, usually when I'm working with them, I will intuit different practices that can help balance them out and that's their homework to do. So it's hard to say like there's one particular thing to do when there are typically very a lot, a lot. Yeah. No, nobody's the same. So yeah, I know.

I will say though that having some sort of practice to help quiet the mind. Is essential for everybody, um, or at least to be able to pull back and see the noise or hear the noise in the mind. [00:20:00] It's part of our human nature is to have so much mind chatter. , anxieties, memories, , thoughts about whatever, you know, I think.

When I became a mom, that went, like, off the charts, too, just, with some postpartum anxiety, for sure. So, a lot of times, I don't think just sitting is going to, like, to help create that space. A lot of times, you have to work it out through the body first. That's what I have to do, at least, um, just because so much of that actually lives in the body.

So, I might need to take a walk. I might need to dance. I might need to do yoga. I might need to lift weights. It just depends on the day. Before I can... I'm going to sit with myself a little bit more. There's also simple things like, you know, just not having headphones in all the time that can help, you know, or driving without music every once in a while.

Or if you are listening to music, doing nothing else but that. [00:21:00] You know, these are just mindful mindfulness practices. If you are with your kids, like be with your kids, right? Like those are, those are really simple things you can incorporate through your day to create more spaciousness and more stillness throughout the mind, because it's really hard to operate and function with all of that mind chatter.

We call it Chittavrithi in yoga, And when we still that a little bit, it's much easier to hear our intuitions. And for me, Am I an intuitive? Yeah. Do I think everyone has the capacity for that? I absolutely do. And what's more important to me than like someone coming back over and over for answers is that they're able to get in touch with that side of themselves and like really strengthen their inner compass.

Yes, I hear you because that happens with my clients as well as a craniosacral therapist too. And [00:22:00] I think, the big piece of that is I agree. I think everyone has that capability, you know, to really listen to their, their selves, their inner selves. I think the big challenge comes when they're not trusting what they're hearing and learning to trust what is coming is a big thing and a big practice and increases that intuition really.

 It really does. And You're going to find out one way or the other, I think. Like, if you don't trust it, it's going to come back in some way at some time. And if you do trust it, you'll probably see the fruits of, you know, your leap of faith a little bit more quickly. You know, there have been things in my life that I knew my intuition was whispering to me for a long time, and I just kind of, you know, had a lot of excuses.

As to why I couldn't, step up to what my intuition was, was saying. [00:23:00] but when I finally listened, like, I could definitely see why I was steered in that direction. Even becoming a mom, like, that was such a thing I fought for a long time. But it was a sick game. You are a mom. I am. Yes. And, I mean. As a mom and, and so in tune to yourself, how do you make the time, that quiet time with having, you know, just work and motherhood and all the other things thrown at you?

Yeah, I will say that it's definitely been a journey figuring that out. I went from like being an entrepreneur and while 

that can be busy, I had a structure to my days and my weeks and I have a lot of time for it. My practices, that's how I was, like, maintaining [00:24:00] my mental health and emotional and spiritual health for a long time.

And then I had my daughter in November of 2020. So already there were certain things I didn't have access to, obviously, because of the time period. And then suddenly I couldn't even, like, get up to go to the bathroom without making arrangements. And it was just like, such a kick in the butt, you know, a welcome one because I wanted her dearly and, you know, really prepared for, for this pregnancy and birth and, and motherhood.

 But yeah, it was something I really had to figure out. So it's gone in phases when I first had her, um, you know, not a lot of that came and it was kind of funny. Like I would get a shower by myself somehow. I'll add on to this that I am married. I have a partner, but he has a very, very demanding and busy job.

He's a restaurant owner. So I am doing a lot of parenting.[00:25:00] So I, my mom would come over or something. I get to take like a real shower, you know, in the early days. And suddenly I'd relax and like, just have a million ideas pouring through my head. And I'd kind

of these right now. Like, please come back later. Cause like, I'm not going to have the space to act on any of these. So that was kind of funny. Just an aside from that as she got a little bit older, we would take a lot of walks in the stroller and I would, you know, listen to meditations or podcasts or even like talk to my therapist on, um, you know, like an online thing while I was, while I was pushing the stroller.

So that was how I connected for a long time with her. And now she's nearing three and she's old enough where every day, you know, she plays with her toys and I'll put on, um, you know, a toddler show on YouTube or something like that while I do my movement and I do my breath work and meditation. Is it interrupted?

Yeah, it's [00:26:00] interrupted. . But I'm still getting that in and she's able to see me doing it too, and eventually she might even join you. I remember my kids when they were little, I would do a, online, you know, they had like, I think ball exercises or something on the TV.

I mean, I'm old, I'm 51 and my kids are seniors. So this is old time stuff. And I would go on there and I'd have them next to me doing it as well. And. It was so fun, and it was fun to introduce them to that, too, so that, , not only were they seeing it, but they were participating, and I remember feeling so much joy, like, I felt like I had done something for myself, but I was still with my kids, and I was still Being a good mom and you know, like it felt so good.

So I feel like I love that you walked and had, I never even thought about walking and listening to a meditation because there's a lot of like walking meditations people do too. So I love that you did that, but even, [00:27:00] yeah, as she gets older, you probably could just even do it with her. Yeah. Yeah. She even asked for a yoga mat.

So she doesn't do much with me, but I'll roll it out next to mine and she'll come and do a couple of down dogs and then go do something else. But yeah, it's really cute to see that already kind of folding in. But yeah, it's still, I mean, it looks a lot different than it used to. And I might only have 30 minutes in the day.

And that's potent time. Like, I think that's one thing that I learned as a mom is like, when you have 30 minutes to focus on something, you can get it done. Yes, yes, you definitely can. 

So how has just becoming more in tune to yourself actually helped with you as

I mean, I think it's helped immensely. I can't, I mean, I can't imagine having kids like 10 years sooner. I'm, I'm 39. I was 36 when I had my daughter. [00:28:00] Had I had her when I was 26, I wouldn't be parenting from the same place.

But, there is a benefit, I think, to waiting if that's, if that's where your life path takes you. So I've had the benefit of doing all of the self work and like loving myself and I feel confident that I'm not going to mess up some things like, yeah. It's going to happen, but I can do that more compassionately with myself, and I can kind of rest knowing that there are certain things that I'm not going to pass on.

It's a, it's a lot of work. I think for moms of our generation, we are like breaking ancestral chains in a lot of ways so that we are creating more freedom and space for our kids to be themselves and love themselves. But I kind of see it this way like. I have a lot of student debt that I'm still paying off and we're saving for my daughter's college and it kind of feels the same way with like, okay, I'm cleaning up all [00:29:00] this energy and work and providing like the path and space for her to, um, to thrive.

So. It's a lot, I think, but it definitely is worthy work, and I'm really glad that I did it, because definitely, like, the same things came up for me that come up for a lot of moms during pregnancy and birth. Like, there's definitely a lot of, like, looking outside of myself for answers. There are so many, like, you could Google anything these days.

So, like, your kid coughs or, like, I don't know. Anything. And you can go down rabbit holes. Um, and for me, I definitely fell into that, but I found that pretty quickly I was able to hone in on my intuition and start parenting from that space rather than like listening to all the noise around me, which is a huge benefit.

Yeah. I think when you can feel confident inside yourself. [00:30:00] I mean, that's huge, right? So, especially as a parent, when you hear a lot of noise and judgments and things like that on the outside, just to be so solid inside, I think, gosh, is only beneficial. Yeah, absolutely. And I think that whether we're raising daughters or sons or gender non conforming, um, Um, you know, doing this work gives them so much space to like figure out who they are.

And it can be really hard sometimes. Like there are certain qualities my daughter has that are, I know they will serve her so well in life. So I know my job is to not stamp those out or tamp them down, but it's still hard sometimes. Like she's really headstrong and I know that that is going to be a great quality for her for her to have in this world.

But it can be definitely tricky as a parent. [00:31:00] Yeah, and, and coming from what you know, it's like, it's, I'm not gonna call it a weakness, but I'm gonna call it a weakness, right? Like, it's almost like, in society, being headstrong as like a three year old, it's like, oh my god, they're so, such a tough kid, right?

Like, they're, they're not the easy kids, so they get all these like, names on them. But yeah, what you're seeing is, no, this is gonna be good later on. Weakness, you know, is actually a strength and we're gonna kind of embody that to love it in herself and I love that that's what you're doing as a parent.

 Well, can you tell us where the listeners can find you? And what else? I know you have a lot to offer on your website. I know you talked about some of it, but like, can you just tell us what you offer? 

And yeah, where we can find you. Yeah, so you can find all my stuff at my laurenleduc. com, L A U R E N L E D U C. And you can find, uh, like, a link [00:32:00] to... Book readings there with me. I also have my chakra course linked. I do monthly full moon goddess ceremonies. They're like women's circles every month that are free.

 I have my chakra quiz, free embodiment practice. And it also links to my podcast, Your Spiritual Besties, which is with my BFF Rashida. We're both moms and we talk about all things spiritual. It's a lot of fun. Very conversational. Um, I'm also the owner of True Love Yoga, which is yoga studio in Kansas City, Missouri.

And we lead yoga teacher trainings that can be done online. So you can do that from anywhere. I'm trying to think what else I'm on Instagram as I am. Lauren LaDuke. Yeah, kind of all over the place. And, um, I mean, it's a whole other conversation, but becoming a mother has really inspired me to create content that can, be done at any time and that can be used over and over.

It's great for my time that I'm not. [00:33:00] Having to teach the same things, you know, in person constantly, and at the same time, , I've designed all of this content to be really usable by people in a similar position as me, like even the book, it's meant to take about 15 to 20 minutes of your time every day, instead of like something that you just sit down and do all at once, Like I was talking about earlier, like that's what I needed.

And that's what I still need, at this point in my life. And many of us are really busy. So I think just having that like potent time to connect is so important. So lots and lots of ways to do it. If anyone has questions or wants to connect more, you can always email me or DM me directly. I'm always happy to chat.

 Well, thank you so much for this discussion. You are just such a calm soul to talk to. I think just even playing this episode or just watching you is just so calming just to be here. So I think you're already balancing me through this energetic thing that we're having here.

It's [00:34:00] so great. Thank you, Lisa. It's been a pleasure.