From Burnout To Clarity with Paden Hughes

Today I am delighted to be joined by Paden Hughes, a best selling author, entrepreneur, and speaker who is a leader in the areas of professional development, entrepreneurship, and health and wellness. Paden is passionate about defining success on her own terms and showing that work life balance is achievable even with young children.

So Paden, thank you so much for coming on the Real Life Momz podcast. Thank you. It's a pleasure to be here. 

 I absolutely Love your story of just being overwhelmed and literally crashing and face planting on the floor. I think a lot of us kind of feel that way. Maybe we don't get to that point of actually falling on the floor, but maybe you can share your story with us and how it led you on this path that you're on today.

 So I know all of us moms got really [00:01:00] shaken up with the pandemic and everyone has their version of that. For me, I was saving a business as the CEO that was a brick and mortar fitness facility that had been shuttered for 10 months. And I was in complete survival mode to the point where I had brainwashed myself to believe that I was doing well.

If anyone had asked me the day before I face planted, I would have said, I'm fine. I'm fine. That classic response. How are you doing Paden? Oh, I'm just fine. The next day, you know, I, I find myself just bleary eyed at my computer screen and I am like shaking myself awake. I'm falling asleep almost in the car.

almost hitting a tree on the way home. I fake it for my nanny, which is just classic and pretend everything's fine. And I closed the door and I stumbled to the kitchen in front of my eight month old and my three year old. And I don't remember what happened. I just remember coming [00:02:00] to and looking up around where I was disoriented and trying to figure out where I was.

And I hear my daughter's voice. Mommy, are you okay? And I can't move my arms. I can't move my legs. It's super emotional to this point. It's probably the lowest of my experiences because I was terrified. I didn't know. I'm was 34 at the time. My body wasn't what I was thinking was gonna collapse on me, but I was running my body like.

It was in some kind of sprint, but acting like it's also a marathon, it was just not sustainable. And so I just got really scared. And I remember just crying and pretending to my kids that I was playing a game that me being on the floor would be a game because I couldn't move my arms. I could only talk.

And so my little son was nonverbal and just. pounced on me and gave me a big hug and it was super emotional. . So that was like the low. And I remember getting on the [00:03:00] phone with my mentor the next week and she said, you need to do something radical in your life.

Like you need, and I said, but what I'm, I'm not new to personal development. I've had therapists, coaches, mentors. I've taken the online courses. I've done the things, but here I am splayed out on the kitchen floor in front of my kids, literally role modeling for them. What a workaholic mom looks like. Which was just defeating every personal standard of success that I could possibly conjure up as a mom.

I mean, like, this is literally not the mother that I wish my children to remember me and it just threw me into this complete... Rethink of my whole life. Like, what am I doing? It's so wrong for my body, for my heart, for my soul and the spirit that just led me to this depletion and complete burnout.

And I was not new to burnout but motherhood plus that was a really torturous [00:04:00] combination that I also know I'm not the only one to experience. And so I felt like I was drinking out of a fire hydrant every day and just trying to make it to the next day and , feeling like I was almost in a dark tunnel of just so much pressure. 

So my mentor basically says, You need to go to Sedona on a soul adventure. And I'm like, what is that? First of all, that sounds really interesting. Like, what is a soul adventure? It kind of lit me up. But then she was like, yeah, you're going to meet with an immersive therapy for four to five hours a day for a week.

And I'm like, well, that doesn't sound as fun. I was like not sure how that feels, but I also know that I haven't had an alone solo trip since I had children, and that seemed redemptive, alone, just to be alone. . I can't really say yes to like.

Immersive soul retreat for a week in a different state, you know, that's [00:05:00] not something that's COVID approved when you're trying to keep your team together and make payroll, right? So I went and I remember going grocery shopping. And it seems so basic, right?

Like, you get your rental car from the airport in Phoenix, and you drive the two hours into the desert of Sedona. I get to my Airbnb, and of course I have to go buy groceries, and I go buy groceries, and I'm crying. Like, ugly tears snot in the mask. Like, crying. I'm just super emotional. Cause I haven't shopped for my own self in five years. I haven't gone to the grocery store and thought, what would I like for dinner?

And it was, seems like a simple moment, but it was. Like it was so profound for me and I couldn't even remember what I liked and I just grabbed Alfredo sauce. Cause I remember as a kid, I liked Alfredo sauce. I'm like throwing the most random things in this bag that like made this crazy dinner.

And I went on to just really [00:06:00] have some major breakthroughs in my life. And it was such, to me, it continues to be one of the big catalysts for my kind of reinvention of myself and who I am, what success even means to me, what am I wanting to be as a mom? Who do I want to be as a human? And it, there were so many breakthroughs, not the least of which was they weren't therapists.

I did zero research into what was actually going to happen once I got there. They were intuitive healers from all over the world. So that was an awareness as a pastor's kid for me to be like, what am I doing here? But I remained open to it and received so much insight. It was just, it rocked my world. What a crazy story. Well, first of all, kudos for you. For going during a pandemic, but just going as a mom, because I think that's sometimes the hardest part is just being able to leave and take care of [00:07:00] yourself, because what you were doing obviously was not good for your health was not good for your family.

It wasn't good for anyone. So. this trip. I, I love woo woo stuff. So you're talking to somebody who just loves it. So I'm like, book me the next trip in with you. I'm so excited. But what were the big takeaways or the big ahas for you that you found when you were soul searching? Ooh, I'm getting chills. I have to tell you the first thing that popped into my mind.

Yeah. Um, I went to, to the first session was a three hour journey on the land. And I'm doing air quotes, because I didn't know what journey on the land meant, and then it was with a man named Sequoia. So I'm alone, journeying on the land with a man I've never met. I show up there and I'm like, I, should I have pepper spray? Do I even have GPS on where I'm at? Is this safe? You know, I think I used to be more reckless [00:08:00] as before I had kids. And now that I'm a mom, I feel like I'm just on lockdown on safety. But I was like, just be cool, Paden

like it's going to be fine. And it was. And he ended up bringing me into a long list, which he called core wounds and said, every person has an inner child. The part of us that is still, probably between six and eight years old, roughly. And a lot of the way in which we get triggered in the world, we show up as this childlike version of us that isn't well mature enough.

And so we respond to the world around us. He said, everyone has a core wound. What's yours? And I'm like, I have no idea. Like, what's my core wound? Like, that sounds like a horrible college essay. So I basically tell him I have no idea what he's talking about really, but it sounds cool. And he pulls out this list of wounds.

It just phrases. And he's like, which one creates this twist in your stomach or brings emotion forward? And it's like, I'm not perfect, I'm unloved, nobody's gonna miss me, [00:09:00] I'm unmemorable, I'm stupid, you know, all the things, and it gets to, I'm not good, and I was like, no, not quite, and the next one was, I'm not good enough, and my stomach twisted, and I felt a frog in my throat, and I was like, well, it's clearly that, and I realized looking back, and we journeyed kind of through my life, and he said, You know, how much have these compromises that you've made to your health, your, your sanity, you know, your identity has been in pursuit of being good enough.

And honestly, that could have been Paden Hughes trying so hard to be good enough, like the tagline for my entire life. And it brought so much emotion to me. And he said, I want you to make a list of everything that you have said to yourself inside your thoughts. Of how you're not good enough and I wrote it down and he had to tell me to stop because I would have kept going like it was like it was flow and all the reasons that I'm not good enough.[00:10:00] 

And he said now I want you to picture your inner child and I've got a good imagination so I'm picturing her with the bangs long hair the buck teeth like the whole thing. And he goes now I want you to read her that list, and I couldn't, and I just started to cry, and he goes. You have to read the list. I said, I just won't do it.

You're asking me to abuse this little girl. And I sat there in silence and he just sort of let me cry. And I just said, am I going to rob myself of the purpose of this journey?

If I don't do this? And he said, yes. So I took a breath and I read the list and then I buried my head in my arms and just sobbed. And , he said, now I want you to look back at that little girl and I want you to see her reaction. And what I imagined in my, you know, inner world was she just looked up at me with the biggest, kindest eyes and hugged me [00:11:00] because she could see that it wasn't about her.

It was the adult version of her who was so critical that I was harming my own self and she had empathy for that. And that healed a huge wound for me. 

And that was a very powerful moment for me to realize that I was my own abuser and that's why it hit me so deep was that I had been abusing my own self in my mind for decades to get to the point of collapse. And that was thisdeep moment of going. I can't do that to her And it was the first time I did inner child work and it was really powerful so powerful and so beautiful.

I've kind of dabbled in that myself. And and yes, there's something about when it comes from within [00:12:00] you it's so healing.

Yeah. And I know there's a decent amount of therapists out there, but we'll say that sometimes awareness. heals a lot more than we give it credit for. And I found that in that moment, I could stop chasing, trying to be good enough. And I feel that three years later, that does still feel pretty complete, which is really powerful.

I think that sometimes healing doesn't have to take that long, but it does resonant. deep moments where you're in your truth, you're naked to yourself, and you are willing to go to the place that you've been hiding from. And so that was, that was a huge breakthrough. The second breakthrough was me sitting down with this woman named Kamala.

 And I sit down with her, and she just looks at me, and she goes, Paden And we haven't talked 

and she says, Paden, I have you as this high achiever who's [00:13:00] running your life and so, so fast. And you're acting like you are a Lamborghini when really you are a Toyota Tacoma. I was just so taken aback by that synopsis and this very unflattering analogy, which I had never had a problem with Toyota Tacomas before and that comparison.

And I was like, well, that's really an ego death. Thank you for that. So she talks to me and she was like, I also think you're a highly sensitive woman. And I'm going, what do you, what are you talking about? I am the chick they bring in to fire people. I'm the one that they come in to restructure businesses.

Like I, I have my own company. Like I'm not the bleeding heart on the team. I'm the nuts and bolts profitability girl. How do you mean I'm highly sensitive? And she was like, We really sat in it and she goes, let me bring you into the study, Dr. Elaine [00:14:00] Aaron's work, which I had never heard about side. No, for anyone that thinks they might be sensitive.

There's a great documentary on Amazon called sensitive the movie. And it really goes into the research behind it. But anyways, it's like, are you overstimulated in crowds? Yes. Do you like small talk? No. Do I get startled and angry with a loud surprising noise? I'm like, yes, yes, yes. Do I hate eating in loud and noisy restaurants?

Yes. Do I feel other people's feelings really intensely? Yes. And the list keeps going on and on. And I've literally said yes to every one of the questions except for are you an introvert? So I find out she goes 2015 to 20% of the population of the world are high in sensitivity, meaning that your nervous systems different than 80% of the world.

And at this point, I don't really know what a nervous system is. And she was like, it's just a different [00:15:00] way of processing. Your brain can go deep and can pattern pick better than most people. But your tank, if you're imagining yourself as like a tank, And all the time people are talking at you, all the information that's coming at you, the lights, the music, the, the side conversations, the pressure.

And it's just filling, filling, filling while the rest of the world might fill at a slower rate. You're full by 11 AM. You're at explosion point at 11 AM and the rest of the world's good for till 8 PM. And I was like, well, that does feel true because I also had mom rage. And would beat myself up so bad for it, not understanding why it was this way.

. And it felt like I had finally felt seen and understood. And there was this deep sense of this is me and I remember I had talked to my dad like a year before and had said, how would you describe me as a girl? [00:16:00] Cause I just felt so disconnected trying to be this masculine business woman in this patriarchal society where Basically, masculinity is praised and rewarded, and so I learned early on if I want to succeed, I can't be soft. 

I have to be hard. I can't be intuitive. I have to be strategic and I had atrophied huge parts of me and he said, Paden, as a little girl, you were the kindest little girl I'd ever met. You were always seeking how to help others, how to lift others up.

And I felt both so proud of that little girl and so deeply sad that I had lost that so long ago. Nobody, truly nobody would have called me kind. In my circle at that moment in time. And it just, when she talked to me, I said, so what do I need to do? And she just looked at me and said, what do you think you need to do?

And I instantly blurt out, before I've had a chance to edit myself, I blurt out the most [00:17:00] horrific thing I've ever said. You have to know, you have to tell us. Yes, I will say, I said I need to take two hours to be alone every day. And she goes, at least. And I'm like, At least? Like, that was the most massive, like, Acknowledgement I've ever said like out loud.

Like I can't even believe I said that two hours. Like who has two hours? That's obscene amounts of time. But as soon as I blurted it, it felt true. And I have since realized that there are things that come out of our own mouths and in our own thoughts that are the most divine wisdom we could ever, ever get.

And if, and it lands as true, if we're willing to sit in it for a second and just weigh it. And when we weigh it, it almost feels like it goes and drops down into your heart and it stays and it's there and you can no longer ignore it. And as soon as I came out, I said, well, you know what? Out of this [00:18:00] whole soul adventure.

That's the one practical piece of actionable advice I can actually. take action on. And I think so often we can come out of these sessions with healers or therapists and go like, I just have to let it go. I just have to lose control. I just have to forgive. And we don't really get what does that actually look like?

What are the steps that we can follow? And I'm a very literal person. And so I've always wrestled with these vague feel good sentiments that honestly feel great, but I can't reverse engineer that into something in my life. So when I had blurted two hours and it landed as true, I was like, Oh my gosh, what have I done?

I've already abandoned my husband is what I was thinking for a week to deal with two children, run the business for me so I can go find myself in the desert, right? Now I'm gonna cruise back in and go, also, I'm gonna take two hours every day and it's not gonna come out of [00:19:00] motherhood, and it's not gonna come out of my sleep, it's gonna come out of my work day.

 So that's what I got out of that whole adventure. Well, I just, okay, I love so much about this story, I really do, especially your passion behind it. But I think that biggest gift of that whole trip was that I forget her name, but the soul reader person who asked you what it is that you need, because I'm a firm believer that We all have the power to heal the power to know what we need, but we don't have always the power to listen.

And I think that by her asking you and not giving you the answer, it wouldn't have been the same if she said to you, Oh, you need two hours a day. Let me tell you, it was, in your heart because it came from inside you. And so I think that's so cool and it was such a great gift that she gave you.

 But of course, my follow up question is going to be two [00:20:00] hours. Oh my gosh. And okay, so what, what are you doing? What are you doing? A, how are you getting the two hours? And B, what are we doing with the two hours? Yes, such good questions. I actually had a lot of those questions myself in the beginning because I became so focused about finding two hours, 

as like a strategic person, I couldn't just have this ongoing thing. Like, I didn't know if it would work. So I was like, let me create a test. I'm gonna give myself 21 days. Now, I had gone right before Thanksgiving. And so I thought, you know, Thanksgiving to Christmas is pretty slow in the fitness industry and in our business.

And I thought to myself, you know, that's when I should demo this. Then I can kind of rehab myself before the new year and then I can hit the ground running was what I thought. And I thought, okay, so I only have to find these two hours. It's just for a few weeks, which I know sounds a lot, but at that [00:21:00] time, that's what I, I felt like that.

Thanksgiving to Christmas felt like really good bookends to this experiment. And so I kind of went for it with that. Plus I was a wreck like, remembering me back then I was. Not happy. I was super depressed. I was anxious. I was a control freak. I was a raging mom. Like I had all sorts of things that were not okay.

So my level of desperation was as high as the eccentricity it would take to pull this off. And I think that's what gave me the courage to do it. So I realized I could, when my nanny came in the morning, which I was so grateful to have during COVID because that was the only way I could make that work  

and she came over and I was like, okay, I don't have to go into the office until she came at nine. What if I don't go to the office till 11? Could I get my workday done from 11 to four? And at the time, and at first I was like, I don't know. And then the thought drops in my head. Again, another moment of intuition dropping in and just a sense of knowing.

Paden you [00:22:00] are almost asleep at your computer every day from 2 to 4 p. m. anyways. Who's gonna notice? And it was so true. I mean, I would get that 2 p. m. crash where you got fourth cup of coffee doesn't even do anything at that point, and you're just zoning out on social media pretending to be strategic and like you're just before you blink your eye you've been on TikTok for an hour.

And so I was doing that every day so that felt really justifiable to sit there and go you know what, would anyone even notice. probably not because so far no one has noticed. So I, I bet on myself and I said, and I, as an entrepreneur, I had that freedom that not everyone has, but I just did it. And I was like, let me go.

And I, I did, I blocked nine to 11 off. And then I figured I'll worry about the weekends later. I remember getting into the car for the first day, feeling like I was finally ready to check the box that I had taken care of myself that day.

And I sat in the car and I had this, this total panic flood me going. What am [00:23:00] I even going to do? Like, what am I going to do? I have spent all this time focusing on getting these two insane hours together. Cause that's what Kamala had said. Don't try to splinter them off, try to get them consecutive. And I'm like, well, this is even worse, you know, and I sit there and I'm like, what am I going to do?

And I remember her saying for highly sensitive people, you have such a vibrant inner world. Meditation is really fun. And I was like, okay, because at that point I could do the Headspace app for three minutes and I would feel really good with myself. Like, ooh, I've observed my thoughts for three minutes.

It was hellish, but I did it. So I was like, okay, let me just see. And then I found like a guided meditation, which I had never done. Before I knew it, I was in some mythical forest in my imagination, meeting a spirit animal. I mean, before I knew it, the two hours was done. And I was like.

Did I just meditate 

and I, and in eight days, [00:24:00] I primarily walked in nature and hiked and did meditations in my car and I felt like a new person I got more done in my work days. My sex drive came back in eight days in eight days I was a patient mom.

I was playing in the park with my kids I Had my libido back like like i'd never experienced before it was wild I was like I am like turned on all the time. Can we please have sex every day? My husband's like, okay I was Skeptical before, but now I'm totally bought in. This is great. Let's send you back to Sedona again.

Yeah. Anytime. Because I mean, honestly, stressed out mom with two littles. It's like the last thing on my mind ever. And then it was like all of a sudden, the thing that felt the most exciting. And I, and then I just felt like I was so proud of myself. I was so proud of myself for showing up for me. It was like energizing itself to say like I knew how to care for myself.

I wasn't [00:25:00] outsourcing that to my husband and making it his fault. I wasn't waiting for someone to rescue me. Like I was showing up and rescuing myself

and it was so powerful. I was like, I won't stop. And I didn't ask permission. I did ask my husband permission if he'd support me for this three week experiment. And then I never, I decided. Um, to have a backbone around this, like in a new fresh version of me, like suddenly I'm a courageous and not self betraying.

And now all of a sudden I'm like, I will never put my wellbeing on a table of negotiation ever again. The only time it could come off was if my kids needed me and it was an emergency scenario. Like, I feel like it was that important. And I know you you talked about a little bit of this like good girl syndrome people pleaser I mean, how do you get past that to be able to?

Put the time in for you and it's really [00:26:00] hard because Essentially if you're struggling with good girl syndrome, it's like a left right punch, which is the punch of your people pleaser for safety to feel safe and to not be a have a target on your back by people as a child that you feel unsafe around.

You stay under the radar. You go crazy. Quiet. When you have something true to speak you, you get small. When you have something big to share in the world, you dumb yourself down so you don't intimidate. You don't want your friends to think you're better than them, so you fake it. You marginalize and diminish your own wins. 

It's all this stuff. So there's that, which is survival coping mechanisms. So this is like entrenched in your subconscious mind as a response. And then you throw , gender stereotypes. Women should be nurturing. Women should be soft. Women should be quiet at first. Women should be a little bit more receding.

They should be supportive, collaborative. They shouldn't come on too strong. They can't be angry. Angry is not allowed. [00:27:00] You know, all these things, you, you throw that in and that's just one huge mind explosion. Of like, how do you win with that? And so for me, the magic was in two things. One, it was making a commitment to myself and holding it.

And it doesn't have to be two hours. It can be small, but it's the sense of, I am not going to let myself down and I am not going to be a flaky friend to myself. That's just, and to whatever it is, whether that's I'm going to read a chapter of my favorite fiction book before bed, and I am going to do that every night, or if it's I am going to, I'm going to be extra and get the bulletproof coffee that I love so much, and I am going to let that be okay, and I'm not going to feel bad for that.

Whatever it ends up being or I am going to have a girl's night once a month and I'm going to do it every month with my two best friends, and we're going to get a cocktail and hang out and just. Connect. It doesn't matter what it is, honestly. 

And so when you go, [00:28:00] I'm not willing to give on something for yourself, , it feels like you're putting on a Wonder Woman cape and you're like cruising into the world. Like, I will show up for me. That's how it felt for me. That was the biggest thing. And the second biggest thing was to remember play and the importance of play.

It's not just for kids. playing and reconnecting to the part of you that needs to feel light and unburdened. I think as moms, that's one of the most suffocating parts of motherhood, especially in the early years, is feeling like you are, you used to be fun. You used to probably be the fun babysitter who had all the best ideas and came over with crafts and like could be like the theatrical wizard reading a book and playing six voices.

That was me for sure. But I lost all of that in motherhood. I wasn't the fun mom. I was the mom who's just trying to hold myself together and not lose control in front of my kids. [00:29:00] And I lost all the fun. . And so when for me to not self betray and show up for myself and then to do it and play, I started to climb trees again. I didn't know what I even liked. to play. First of all, I made a list because I was thinking about that inner child exercise.

I was like, I wonder what she would do for play. Well, so then I didn't even know this was a therapeutic technique and there's actually something called play therapy. That's incredibly revolutionary and gets amazing results for people. I kind of like stumbled into this. I made a list of everything I remember liking as a kid.

I'm like, I loved coloring. I was super into glitter pens and like coloring that. You know, and so I was like, okay, I'm going to get some glitter, like a coloring book. Like, and then I was like, I remember liking art and I hadn't touched art in a while and painting specifically. I remember loving nature and loving trees.

And I loved to swim. And I love, so I made a list of everything, picnics and reading on. And I just did them one by one to see how much joy it would [00:30:00] bring me. And I found the two or three go to moves that every time I would do them, my energy would just soar. My happiness would hit like a 10 out of 10 and I could charge into my day with that energy.

And it just radically changed me and maintained it, And I realized the only reason I could not self betray Was because I looked so forward to what I would do in that time.

I made it something that was like dessert for me I love that because I think people fall into the self care is like let's go get your nails done or get my hair colored or something and like that like kills me I, I love like having my nails done but I hate sitting in that chair so much like I hate it.

I'm just like, if I could be like on the Jetsons you know that cartoon where you just like walk through the machine and they're done. That would be beautiful like then I would be like yeah sign me up. But it kills me. So I love that you [00:31:00] are thinking of other things and that they're exciting to do, so you're not gonna not do them.

It's not the things that you think you should do. Yeah. And a lot of people ask me, Paden what should I do? I'm like, truly, I cannot tell you. What I can give you are some prompts, you know, like I even just shared here, like what did you like as a kid? What makes you happy? And explore that list and find what feels true still.

And I wouldn't say I've cured myself. I found a way to cope with the nervous system that I have with the sensitivity and the gifts that that brings forward requires me to power down.

And when I don't, I go back to a version of me. I don't love. And that's just my truth. I think the point here to share is that without doing that work that sometimes we feel is a little selfish, right? Like self care. Sometimes people think are selfish. But if you don't do that work, then you're not a person that people want to be around anyway, including yourself. 

[00:32:00] So by giving yourself those two hours, you're giving 100% to everybody else too. And I remember the moment I realized that was true, because in my head that sounds true, but sometimes in our life we can forget how that resonates in real time. And I remember one day I was a little snarky, short tempered, hurt to my daughter, tone not super generous, and she goes, Mom, did you take your alone time today?

And I was like, no, I haven't, and she goes, maybe you should do that. Amazing. Cause you've also taught her like now you're passing the torch. Cause now she knows that people need that, including maybe herself. So that's amazing. Cause it's not just impacting you. It's impacting the whole family.

Absolutely. And now she'll say, Mom, I need some alone time. And she'll grab her books and she'll, she doesn't even read yet. And she'll go into her bedroom, close the door. And she'll just look at books for like a 45 minute time period. She [00:33:00] chooses it. And she comes back when she's ready. And I'm like, That is what I hope I would.

I'm so grateful that what I'm modeling now is how to my daughter's awareness and when she needs to regulate and that she knows to do things she loves and that that's why we do things we love and that there's a definite connection between happy people and people with hobbies. It's amazing to me. I had a good friend of mine.

Um, For my work, I'm conducting an ongoing qualitative study on highly successful female entrepreneurs. And in an interview, one of the very successful women I interviewed said, I don't think society looks enough at the importance of maintaining personal hobbies when you're building success. Because Because we think sometimes it has to have an outcome for us to justify it.

What if happiness is the outcome? What if the happiness that's the outcome actually produces better [00:34:00] energy? That creates a more creative space. There's a reason why people say they have shower thoughts. It's hilarious to me that in corporate America, that's a legitimized thing, but intuition is not. And I'm like, that's what it is.

That's what's happening with your shower thoughts, is you've quieted, you've given your left brain enough simple tasks to do that the right brain shows up with the creative thought in that moment. Well, what if you went on a walk? before a really big meeting. What if you went on a walk before a big confrontation that you're scared of that's triggering all your stress responses and you could put your feet in the ground and you could breathe deeply and you could remind yourself who you are and you could come at it with generosity and love.

It would radically shift our experience. We wouldn't just be in this rat race running depleted to thing after thing after thing. And I've now come to believe that the most powerful person in the room is the most regulated person in the room. .

 Oh, I love [00:35:00] it all. And I have so many intuitive shower thoughts and my best ideas are always on a walk.

 Now I know you have a lot to offer. So where can listeners find you and tell us a little bit about your programs and things that you have.

So right now you can go to padenhughes.Com if you want to see what offers that I have, or I'm very active on TikTok and Instagram. Those are my two favorites, just padenhughes are my handles. Um, and I have a small, I think it's 4. 99. 4. 99, around a program that I built around repatterning good girl syndrome.

And a lot of what I shared in this conversation actually maps to that where it talks about how to prioritize yourself, how to make, make time, not find time, how to How to what to do if you get there, how to make that work for you, and how to start repatterning our tendencies to diminish, play small, and basically self sabotage our success, which is never something any of us would want to [00:36:00] do.

Whatever success means to us, it's such a personal definition. So that's my favorite thing that I offer, and I intentionally made it very affordable. Um, the other, um, program that I'm offering that is coming in the next Month, will be called Success Codes and it's all about the deep learnings and walking everyone through some of the really powerful shifts and moments of impact that I've had in the last three years that have completely reinvented and transformed my relationship to money, my relationship to self trust, my relationship to a spiritual context.

Thanks. And my intuition so and boundary setting, etc. So many things that I was so horrible at and became wise 

around and distilled that into a course that will be available. But again, all of that can be on. Padenhughes.com I have to ask you one more question, and that is, what does success mean to you [00:37:00] now? Yeah, that's a great question. Success to me is connected to what the Japanese word, ikigai, and it means your reason for waking up in the morning, 

so my reason for waking up in the morning. Is to help women understand that you can have it all, which I know is a triggering concept, but we can and how I can show up in the world and allow women to stop self sabotaging and to start really working with their inner wisdom, working with their energy to create a life they love.

And so for me, success is if I can be a catalyst for change. And to help light flames and other people that also understand the power, the role oxygen plays in sustaining the light inside of you, then that will feel like I'm a success. 

I love that. I think knowing your purpose. Is so important in your why in, putting it in everything you do.

So I love that [00:38:00] answer. So thank you so much for this just lovely conversation. I mean, you gave us so much information and thanks for your vulnerability about just your whole story and your background, because I think it is going to help somebody who's listening. Awesome. Thanks, Lisa.