Reawakening Your Imagination with Melissa Llarena

Welcome to the Real Life Momz Podcast. It is time to take a break from all our to dos and carve out some time to focus on ourselves. I'm Lisa Foster, your host, and today we have an incredible guest who's all about igniting the spark of creativity within us. Joining us is fellow mom, Melissa Larina. She is a best selling author, an imagination coach, speaker, and podcast host.

And Melissa is here to help us reawaken our imagination. And tap into that creative power we all have inside of us. So hi, Melissa, welcome to the show. Thank you, Lisa, for having me and listener. You too. You're gorgeous. You had a good day. Let's just all start on that premise. So thank you. Thank you, Lisa, for this.

I love that. I love your vibe. In fact, on the way home, I had my son, I picked him up from school and he was like, can we go to Starbucks? And I was like, Oh, I don't know if I'm in the mood, right? Like it's like a special treat. But then I was like, you [00:01:00] know what the pumpkin stuff is out. And like, you know what, at the end of the day, I could not be here tomorrow.

We don't know. We don't know. So there I am driving off through the drive thru and he's like, and so we did, we had the best. Like that pumpkin cream cheese muffin thing. Okay. Everyone has to get that. That is amazing. So yes, I love that. You just said that. I am excited because we're trying to reawaken our imagination, which I do feel is something that definitely gets a little fade y into the background as we become parents and just our time and just juggling all the things. So I love that you say that.

It's like a superpower that every mom possesses. And I think even like use the term fertile imagination, and that's also the title of your book. So I would love you to kind of explain that concept to us. Well, it's something that I needed when I realized that I felt [00:02:00] rather dull inside. I remember, when I became a mom, this was some time ago.

Now I have three boys, but back then I only had one. And I felt like, okay, Now what? You know, it's kind of like, okay, I'm with this child 24 seven. I literally one night, call my mom and I was like, what am I supposed to do with him? Like, I actually had no idea because I had been working in like corporate America for at that point over a decade.

So for me, it was kind of like, okay, we don't have an agenda. , I like doing these things, but here's like a little cute little person, a little cherub. And, and I'm not sure kind of how to, You know, hang out with him. And because of that, funny enough, because of that, I decided to start doing one arts and crafts with him, whether he was part of it or not, every single day.

So when dad would come home, his dad, we would then present, whatever it is [00:03:00] that most of the time mommy did. Which is really interesting because again, just imagine you have like a six month old clearly He was not participating really really And it was like an opportunity for me to kind of like tap back into that little girl that I remember being the one that We couldn't really afford like the Lisa Frank stickers, but man, I wanted them, I'm more of like the poochie era and I'm sorry, I'm dating myself, but you know, Smurfs and the like, Oh, I know that for me.

Yeah. You relate, you're late. So That that's the whole thing. , I tell people all the time and it was part of the inspiration for my book. We have these imagination experts in residence, we have our children and they clock in, about those 10, 000 hours up until the age of 12 or so where they are just, imagining everything, a paper towel roll is a telescope.

I mean, anything can be anything, [00:04:00] and they're really, really believing it. And they look like they're having fun. And so for me, I was like, okay, there's something to really letting myself play again, letting myself, have fun and add levity or a lightness. To an otherwise, overwhelming day, anyone that's listening, I mean, I'm sure you've all had days that it's like, okay, wow, it feels like a lot, what I would give to go back to my childhood self where I could like, just, read a book in a cool little nook.

I don't even know if that's a thing, but it rhymed and enjoy myself, and just kind of observe life and be present. And a lot of us want to be present moms and one pathway to being present is by reawakening your imagination. And for me, when I became a mom a second time around this time to identical twins, that's, that's when my sleepless nights were just something on a next level.

I just can't really describe what [00:05:00] sleepless nights looks like when you have a two year old and identical twins. I was unable to think about, these glorious visualizations I would have and just use my imagination all because I wasn't sleeping. So you started out Lisa, the conversation saying that as moms, as parents, sometimes we, we don't feel too imaginative.

And my whole thing is that Well, here's the deal. As a parent, you might not be sleeping as ideally as you wish, but you know what has been sleeping your imagination. And so there's three steps. Anyone that's listening for you to take that is going to help you get your imagination Back in business basically right and fertile imagination just to clarify what that means, what that means to me, and what I would love anyone that reads the book to kind of consider [00:06:00] is.

Your imagination, if it's a fertile imagination, has the ability to cast a vision that you have never seen another mom ever achieve before, right? So it's like, it might feel like out of the realm of possibilities for a mother. Because of the scripts, and I mentioned this in the book, that a lot of us were handed by our mothers, or what we saw in our grandmothers, or our softas, or our nonas, you know, depending on, or abuela, how I call my grandmother.

So, there's a lot that you can learn. reimagine when a you tap back into your own imagination, but then there's also a lot that you can, almost problem solve too, once you make really good use of your fertile imagination. As I mentioned, step one, and there's three is you reawaken your imagination. [00:07:00] And what that means is it's a lot of like the mindset work that a lot of us hear of out in the world, right?

So whether it is a meditation practice, or it might be literally like exercising, movement, breath work, whatever it might be, or journaling, for example, or even coloring with our kids. That is going to give your, your body the opportunity to realize that, Oh, I might have a really cool idea in my head.

That I want to bring out into the world, right? So you've got to like give it a chance to be audible and that requires stillness a lot of times and it also requires a lot of reflection. So you want to really understand, your relationship to being creative because some of us don't feel confident enough.

I didn't to calling ourselves creative. And that's step one. It's like, okay, let me reawaken the imagination by giving [00:08:00] you a chance to like, wake up, right? So being still with ourselves or reflection, etc. Then once we wake it up, that's when the ideas start bubbling up. It's like, Oh, wait a minute, in that morning hour when no one else's is awake, right?

It's like you start getting these ideas or in the shower or whatever. But here's the thing. Our imagination is just like a child, a child wants our attention. So we do not play with the idea that we've been given. The imagination is going to retreat and say, Oh no, no, no, I'm not wanted here anymore. Right.

Which is what happens, which is why it's asleep in the first place when we grow up, because we stopped listening to it. And so we need to play with our imagination. And it so happens that go figure if you are a mom. Right. You have the best playmate available to you. Our kids want to play [00:09:00] with us like all the time in every way.

And I think it's such a blessing that we don't realize because it's right under our noses. And oftentimes we don't put like in our to do list. Stop and play with my child. But isn't it interesting, at least in my house, I don't know, the listener or yourself, Lisa, that, if you have a partner, for example, and for me, my husband, he'll come home.

And the first thing he wants to do is play with our kids. But if it's me, the first thing I want to do is clean up after my kids. Yeah, I do that. I actually have them do their own thing, but you know, you get the drift. So play with your imagination means, okay, I have an idea. Let me play with, let me play with it.

Let me explore it. Let me experiment. Let me try things that are out of character outside of my comfort zone. And maybe, yes, my child can help me, play with this imagination. Reawakened first. So you have that stillness, you have that [00:10:00] reflection journaling movement. So it's very kind of body focus, right? Being still, then you have playing with your imagination, which is okay. So I got the idea. Whatever idea it might be because of that moment of stillness or that moment when I was really just in tune with my body.

Now I'm going to play with this idea that came up because if I don't play with it, I just ignored it. And it's going to go away. Again, my imagination, it's going to say, Oh, I'm not wanted here anymore. Step three. stretch your imagination. That often requires other people. So what does that mean? An idea that you never tell another human being is just not as useful as an idea that you tell at minimum one human being.

And I want to just say your kids count too. So There's an opportunity for you to, you know, share your idea with your child and even enlist them in the process. Because here's the saying, right? The saying is, pretend I'm a five year old explain it to me in simple [00:11:00] terms, right? You hear that a lot.

Well, here's the thing listener or Lisa at one point. We literally had five year olds under our noses, right? And so our kids can like facilitate exactly what other people wish they had under their roofs, right? As a competitive advantage, right? So in the process of bringing this idea that we had to life, whether it's a business idea or the way that we design our lifestyle, it can actually be, a family thing and it can just be this cycle, right?

So you're reawakening your idea and then you're playing with it. And then you're stretching, your imagination and it just gets bigger and bigger and bigger.

Totally. And it makes so much sense because I am a meditator.

I am a walker. I do all those things and my mind just goes crazy and I will have thoughts , I guess the imagination all the time, things I want to do, whether it's in business or things I want to create or. Whatever it is and what happens [00:12:00] is if I don't take action on it, I, I forget it.

Like all of a sudden I'm like, Oh my God, what was that? I knew I wanted to do something. What was it? Or I'm excited about it. And I want to like do it. I'm like, Oh, I'm going to do that. But then when I wait too long, all of a sudden it's like. Gone like I don't have the motivation anymore it's not as exciting so it's interesting because I'll have all that stuff come up and just like you said like if I'm not taking action or playing with it or whatever you want to call it as like that second step or even stretching it and talking to somebody about it.

It just all of a sudden it just fades, and then it doesn't get done. And when I do take action right away, it's like this download of something cool that I really want to do or make or create. And it gets done so quickly. Cause it's like right there, I can do it. I know it's right there.

Yeah, and it's a source of energy. It's so interesting because I just created like a 30 day planner and I'm handing it out as a gift for a [00:13:00] masterclass I'm doing September 23rd. And in the planner, I literally mapped out, okay, you want to be, like really intense as a business owner and do all these things for 30 days.

That's fantastic. apply the same level of focus and commitment to finding sources of energy to put inside of you, right? So what does that mean? That might mean the meditation that might mean playing, that might mean going to a fun museum. And it's, it's so interesting because we're, we're lopsided. A lot of us moms, we're so not balanced.

We're willing to go full force in one direction, but this whole sources of replenishment, that's where we're missing the mark. And for me, when I have an idea, just like you mentioned, Lisa, when I have an idea, it's inspired, like, action that I take, right?

It's not drudgery. It's not like, Oh, great. I have to write another email. Although emails are not my friend, but we [00:14:00] could talk about that another time. So I think that a lot of us, have a hard time of finding and maintaining energy. And I think if we consider just one idea, which is how can we plug back into, One source of energy, which is that, spirit of childhood wonder, right, that is something that can still serve us, even as adults.

It's not just for kids. And when I was writing my book, fertile imagination. That's what I stumbled upon. I was like, wait a minute. So I impossible for me to imagine that, only a child is going to benefit from using their imagination. Impossible. And so for me, having lived through a lot of complicated experiences as a little girl, um, I always had to turn to my imagination as like this.

Saving grace, to be honest, during very like stressful moments, I had to grow up rather quickly. My mom has manic depression. She was a single mom. [00:15:00] And so for me, it was like an opportunity for me to have dreams, as opposed to a little bit of the chaos that I saw, which was my reality.

So some people, I think, feel like they probably never had an imagination. Like maybe they're just that person. Other people probably are listening and saying like, Oh God, I haven't imagined anything in so long. Where to start with your imagination? Well, I would say if you're a parent of a child that's,, under 18, as an example, the the easiest way back into that headspace would be to play or hang out with your kid.

Like that's just like that's low hanging fruit, hang out with your kid and here's the kicker and let them guide you in terms of what's going to happen that particular hangout. Right. So I even have like a five day challenge on my website on fertile ideas. com where I actually put in there the opportunity for you to do exactly that.[00:16:00]

So a lot of us do things and. things that are like within our comfort zone. But guess what? Chances are like, if you let your kid kind of take the lead, like they're going to have you do some pretty eclectic things, right? It might start in video games and it might go to like the floor is lava kind of a thing says no one that's experienced, right?

Listener like, think about it, right? Like, have you ever played the floor is lava and been like, why am I standing on my sofa? I mean, I have. So That's the whole thing. Like that's a starting place. Now, let's imagine that your child is a an adult,

they're in college or anywhere. What I would turn to is a children's book, your favorite as a child. So for me, I love, Madeline. I'm like, okay, what was it about that book?

Okay. It was outside of the United States. That was appealing to me, France, Eiffel tower. That was appealing to me when I got that book for Christmas, I had to do like a scavenger hunt in order to find it. That was so cool, [00:17:00] right? So it gets me back in that place. It's just like sense also, right? So sense, if you, if you smell a scent from a time when you were a child or from a trip where you felt like.

blissful, you can really go back to that moment, and really just kind of be like, wow, I remember when I was a little girl and I would hear my great aunts talking about their days in Cuba. And, and those sensations, the bodily sensations,

help you tap back into your imagination. Mm-Hmm. , even if you don't have a small child under your roof. So it's, it's definitely possible.

I love this because I do think as an adult to actually imagine is so important because let's even even imagining what your future is going to be like as you become an empty nester and being creative with that.

And I love the fact of starting with Kind of your own kids because they're not judging anything, right? They're [00:18:00] just there and they're like excited that you're playing with them and they're excited that you're there So like anything you come up with even Is amazing And I thought about when my kids were little I remember my daughter came home from kindergarten.

I think it was. St. Patrick's day, so they had to made these little feet that they had to follow. And there was like this leprechaun in their room, but they couldn't spot it.

So what I did for the morning of the next day when she woke up and my son woke up, I had made little like pink feet in our living room, like little steps all the way out to our swing set outside where it has a rainbow arch. And I put candy there and there was this little treasure hunt for them to go through.

And it was like just a fun like thing that I just made up. Randomly, it was so fun to be creative and my kids like loved it. But even if they didn't, it wouldn't be a big fail, it's like a, something you can try and just do something like random and fun and exciting, and they'll like, love it [00:19:00] because you're doing something with them.

So I think it's such a fun place to practice. Yes. Yeah. And you know what? I bet you and I'm not like this, chemical specialist, but I bet you, you got like that same chemical inside of you after you work out or something. I don't know. It's like an endorphin. Yeah. Endorphin or something while you were hiding, those pieces and, and also there must've been.

And it's so funny. I just got like goosebumps right now. I was like, I want to do this now. Lisa, now you got me. You can, you should. Yeah. And here's the thing. So many of us, and I know it's like early for me to say this and I apologize if you're getting the heebie jeebies, but you know, Elf on a Shelf.

That's like imagination at play for sure, and I don't think that you really need like this third party company to like give you a toy to imagine things. But I feel like we have opportunities. And I don't know, maybe I am getting in that Christmas spirit now, but I'm like, [00:20:00] Christmas is when it really comes out for me.

But yeah, use the holidays as opportunities. You know what I mean? Halloween is coming up for goodness sakes, like, hello. Or the tooth fairy. That's a fun one. You could do lots of things with the tooth fairy.

Absolutely. Absolutely. Love that it, that you can play with it with your kids, but my question is, how do you start to incorporate it more into your life outside of maybe the family and using this imagination just to get you, because it's exciting. It is. It's so exciting to, you know, Be creative.

. So there's, there's definitely practical and impractical ways of going about this. Right. So I'll go with practical. So for me, as an example, I've read and I encourage anyone that's listening to grab a hold of Julia Cameron's, the artist way. Are you familiar with that book, Lisa? So in her book, Julia Cameron suggests something called artists dates.[00:21:00]

And what that is, is that you yourself as a regular, fully formed human being, you go out to a cool place. It could be anywhere. At least for me in the past, it has been, , like a museum that maybe nobody else wants to go to, but you, right. Or it could be, some sort of arts and craft or like it could be a farmer's market.

When I was studying abroad, this is my pre mom days, but when I was studying abroad, I would go to every single farmer's market, in Paris, for example, now as an adult, now as a mom, what I will do is I'll escape. Right. So it's kind of like mission impossible. It's like jumping out of a plane, being like, all right, bye.

I escape on a Saturday, it could be one Saturday every month. And I will go to something that only I want to go and do. So this past Saturday, I went to a cheese shop here in Austin. I know it sounds so boring. No, I love it. I'm coming with you. Okay. Well, here's the [00:22:00] thing. So. Here's why it's interesting.

It's interesting because I never went to this neighborhood, Hyde Park in Austin. I've lived here for two years and I was like, huh, let me check it out. So I drive to this location and I see the cheese shop and I go in and I'm just observing. I'm like, oh wow, look at all those like meats and cheeses and wines.

And then just, through curiosity, and this is weird because in Austin and in a lot of places in the U S. You don't walk around, but I'm a born, New Yorker. And so I must walk someplace. Um, so I was walking in 105 degree weather, but I was walking to like the cheese shops, secondary location.

And I go in and the lady was like, Oh, are you part of this private party? And I'm like, no, but say more what's going on. Right. And so she's like, Oh, we're having a gender reveal. So what was I doing in that moment? I also noticed, let me just, this is kind of cool too, there was [00:23:00] another store, same area, that it had avocado margaritas.

Never heard of such a thing. Yeah. And then there was another store that sold shoes custom made from Peru. And there were these clogs that looked quite heavy, but really interesting. So here's the whole idea. This is what an artist state does for me. I have a business. I also have, a lot of ideas brewing in my head.

So I just casually will pick a day in the month and I'll go to really cool places that no one else will go with me sometimes. Right. So now I know avocado margarita, that's kind of interesting. So that might inspire an idea for me in terms of like a story that I tell in a newsletter that I publish for my audience.

Right. I'm a podcaster too. Now I'm literally using that avocado margarita story, right with you, Lisa, and now we want to get margaritas and, and so things like that inspired small talk. So if you're a [00:24:00] business owner, or if you're in corporate America and you're going to those otherwise awkward networking.

Events. No one said that you had to talk about the weather. You're not Sam champion or name your local weather person, right? No, you could say anything. You could say, I went to a cheese shop. They had private events. It was a gender reveal. I felt like I was just, a cheese shop crasher or something, right?

That's way more interesting than, wow. The weather, the traffic. Right. Yeah. Or about your kids. Right. Right. You want to talk about other things. Yeah. And that's practical. Like that's once a month, you're not going to get in trouble. Right. Once a month, maybe they'll notice you're gone. I don't know. It all depends.

Daily things you could do. Right. And I tell people you could have it stack. So I already know you're gonna go to every morning. This is at least what I do. Like I'll make myself coffee, right?

Every morning. It's like there is, there is no surprise there, right? . So what do I do maybe during that time? You know, maybe that's when I do [00:25:00] some sort of breathing exercise while the coffee maker is brewing.

What does that allow for me, a business owner? It allows me some stillness so that I give the ideas that are in my imagination a chance to come out and be heard. And maybe I do that because I don't have extra time in a day. So now I'm habit stacking something I already do. You could do the same thing with brushing your teeth, for example.

So there's tiny little things that you can do so that you're more receptive to Expansive thinking to fresh ideas and also super easy peasy. You don't even have to walk anywhere. Maybe it's just not comfortable or accessible to you. You could also just read a book that is on a topic that you would never, ever touch.

Okay. So if you're someone that likes design, for example, all of a sudden, read a book about [00:26:00] programming. I gotta believe there's some interesting ones out there. I haven't looked, but you tell me, so yeah, I mean, there's, there's so many opportunities to, to be creative on your own without the kids, without your family, without money.

You just have to really think to yourself, okay, this is how, I want to live out my day. Right. So you might want to ask yourself that, like, how can I live out my day today so that it serves me to the, to the best. Yeah. And I love the idea of going and doing something a little different, something new, like for an example, it was like one of my best days.

Ever Really. I came home and there was this free, free lot of free events, right? Art, like fair, if you will. And it was just like literally, I've never seen something like this before. It's like it was in the neighborhood and it went through different houses. So you get a map at the first house and you go to different homes.

that just have their art out. [00:27:00] Like it was so cool and it was a neighborhood I hadn't been to. Of course nobody wanted to come with me because also it was about 100 degrees. I'm also originally from New York so maybe it just didn't bother me. I don't know. And it was so cool. So much fun like I came back and I literally had the best day and do I like art I appreciate it I wouldn't say I'm an artist or understand any of it But it had like jewelry and pottery and all this amazing stuff And it also had these like little raffles that were just free that you put in and I ended up winning earrings and a necklace like I came home and I was like This was literally the best, like, afternoon.

It was so inspiring. I got to talk to people I would never talk to. I got to appreciate art I would never see. And I got some jewelry on top of it, which is a win. But yeah, if I didn't take that time just to do something a little different, a little new, I wouldn't have felt that way. And it really like, kind [00:28:00] of got me excited and it sparked my imagination.

I could come at this in a lot of different ways, but the thing is that when you're playing, you're in flow and you're really, really present. And there's just something about that, that makes you feel lighter and more hopeful and excited. And it gets you up when, otherwise you might feel like, Want to just I don't know, crash into the sofa, right?

Just like, ah, this is an exhausting day. It really does light you up.. And anyone that's listening right now, I would invite you to just consider it as an option. Because here's one thing, we are great at using our imagination. What's worrying? We're imagining the worst. Oh my goodness.

all the time, right? What if that person, what if my child, you know, gets home late, or what if my child does this, or what if my partner does that? That's [00:29:00] imagination. We could just flip it around to focus on something that's more positive, but we're using our imagination. It's just kind of like in the wrong direction.

I love that. That's such a good point. And yes, that's easy. I can do the what if game all day long. So yes, that's so true. Now, what would you like the listeners if they could do one thing after turning off this podcast? What do you want them to do? I would say play with your child. And again, that's like, age specific, but let's say that your child is an adult, just call them and tell them that you're proud of them.

That's it. That is the one thing. Engage with your child, be present in that way, in the way that they need you. I think that's the flip right there. Cause a lot of our kids want to play with us when we might want to do other things. And maybe, when our kids grow up, maybe we want to give them advice or, or kind of like make comments about [00:30:00] certain things, but maybe we should just give them what they might really need, which is to hear that we're proud of them.

Yeah, well, tell us a little bit where the listeners can find you and what are the things that you offer? I would love anyone that's listening to just go to the same device where you're listening to this podcast and check out my podcast, Mom Founder Imagination Hub. Anyone that's seeing this, you could see my little.

Artwork, super cute, curly hair, mom. And definitely check it out going to have an, uh, An appreciation for the different people that, are willing to talk to you.

If you just ask them, that's part of the services that I provide as a coach to mom founders. So anyone that, is launching a business or anyone that's trying to seek business growth, I help you really get more comfortable in terms of being in front of high profile, prospective clients or investors, or people that you want to collaborate with.

Many [00:31:00] of whom start out as strangers and I love talking to strangers and I can help you do the same. So just go ahead to um, Instagram. You can find me there, Melissa Lorena or on LinkedIn. I know there's so nerdy, but, but just go with me here. I love LinkedIn. I'm going to have a t shirt made that says that.

So find me on LinkedIn, Melissa Lorena, because that is where I'm going to share with you everything that I have coming up. So September 23rd, depending on when you listen to this, I'm going to have a free masterclass, and I'm going to be giving out by the way, anyone who attends that planner that I mentioned earlier, but the masterclass is about those professional relationships.

That are going to help you in terms of your business growth. And I want to be sure that you get them without the burnout. So the planner I mentioned a little earlier, I'm going to give it to anyone that attends my masterclass on September 23rd for free. So you could just go to [00:32:00] melissalarina. com forward slash master class.

I would love to see you there. Awesome. And you also have a book out too. Where can they find that one? Absolutely. So, I mean, that's going to be anywhere and everywhere, but I would invite you to go to my website because you're going to get a free chapter there. And that might spark some ideas for how you can start using your imagination like right now for free.

So go to fertile ideas. com and you can get a free chapter of my book is called fertile imagination, a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum. impact. Definitely grab the free chapter, get started immediately. And thank you so much, Lisa. Oh, well, thank you so much for coming on the show.

It's like, I love your just your energy and your inspiration. And now the imagination piece. So I'm so glad that you came on and talk to us about this. Thank you.

I'm so glad [00:33:00] you could tune in for this week's episode.

Make sure you check out the show notes so you can grab all of Melissa's great resources, books, and upcoming courses and let's reawaken our imagination together. Let's take that first step and just play whatever that means to you, whether that's playing with your children or going out for a cup of coffee with your adult children,

or you just taking time to do something new that you haven't done before, let's learn to play and spark our imagination this week.